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You shouldn't date him.
Here's why...
He will take you out to great places, but order a salad bowl for himself. He also won’t share anything out of the fancier stuff that you might order.
During a date, he might bring up absurd things that he'd have read in a book or thought of afterwards, such as how Winnie The Pooh stories are interlaced with history’s major philosophers’ works, or how, after reading about Quantum Physics, he thought that ghosts are nothing but a quantum state of our conscious existence.
You’ll rarely be able to wear fancy dresses on trips with him, because his travel wardrobe is designed for hiking around the world, and you might look out of place around him.
(He may also grow a moustache without fair warning.)
He lives a minimalist lifestyle. The only blazer that he owns as of today was bought for his school farewell, worn again on his college farewell, and continues to be worn till today. The only condition on which he'll not wear it on your own wedding is if your 10-year XIRR beats his.
On the other hand, having him around while shopping will be a disaster for your wallet, because while you’ll be trying a handful of dresses, he will go out and find two handful more for you to try, and you’ll always end up buying more than you budgeted for.
(You can leave your handbag with him. He won't go through it; not until the 5th date at least.)
He rarely and barely drinks. But even without that, he embarrasses himself quite easily. Best not to encourage him in places or around people that you hold dear.
While you’ll be hoping for a leisurely life, he will be busy making you a habit chart for your birthday so that you can become the best version of yourself.
He has a daily limit of photos that he can appear in or click for others, so he won’t be the best person to take along on trips. But that is not the worst part. The worst part is that he loves to photobomb others’ photos, and he will do that to your photos most lovingly.
If you both get really close, then on every Diwali, he will send you and your loved ones, along with his loved ones, his uniquely (and unpredictably) weird Diwali wishes.
If you twist your ankle on one of his adventurous dates, he will take you to the hospital, distract you with stories while you wait for that dreaded X-Ray, consult with the doctors, find a physiotherapist, and then get you your favorite street food, before dropping you back home for the day.
(True story!)
Last but not the least, his idea of an interdependent relationship requires a lot of conscious effort.
Be careful what you wish for.
Oh, quite importantly, he has decided to become a dinosaur.
"My bloodline ends with me."
Still wish to know more about him?
Tell him why you'd want to, at:​
instagram.com/parishrutb
OR
Buy him a Book at:
buymeacoffee.com/parishrutb
You've been warned.
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Content Credits
In order of appearance
Scary Salad
#009
Book in a Bar
Yours sincerely
Dressed to Hike
Friends who've been bearing with me since bachelors
The Only Blazer
r/FIREIndia
Outside her Trial Room
#008
Dirty Dancing after Chai
Recent friends who didn't yet know what they had signed up for
Photobombing by the River
Friends from a trek
Daunting Diwali Wishes
Yours Sincerely
Hanging Out in a Hospital
A fun girl who accepted a climbing date even though we knew we were incompatible
Codependent No More
A friend from work
"Bhatified"
A friend from NID
This entire idea
Bruce Almighty
Acknowledgements
To those who recommended him to folks in their social circle.
Radhika Mohta
(Matchmaker & Relationship Coach)
An old friend and her husband from his new neighbourhood
(Genuine souls who are very persistent and mindful)
​
His GenZ cousin
(Bro went all out!)
​
A friend from his bike-riding group
(He touched his soul when he offered to recommend!)
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